'Aye, right' says disillusioned Guardian reader.
Following the prime minister's complete political meltdown and resignation, scores of Guardian readers who have had their hopes dashed time and again, are struggling to allow themselves to believe it's true.
"He can't be going over this. Like, the creep Pincher feeling folk up and getting promoted is fucking awful, but it's standard Tory awful. Wait, it was guys he was touching? Well, Lib Dem awful then. But how is that worse than all the other shit BoJo's done?" asked a nihilistic Labour supporter. "Naw, I don't believe it. He's going nowhere."
"Is he actually gone? Oh, he said he's going to go in the autumn. Well thank fuck BoJo's never lied in his life. Fuck's sake." said the Guardian's senior editor when asked for comment.
At press time Johnson is believed to be working out if he can resign and also run as a candidate again to become his own replacement. The nation waits with bated breath to see how, somehow, Gove can betray him in this endeavour.